And I just keep away from you, keep away from me, you were a song to sing, a way to say I need you more, you need to stay.

White and varying shades of grey drift silently across the blue expanse. The warm light brightens up the dull brick across the way, but none of it reaches me. I am here with only myself and my thoughts, and that is a historically dangerous thing. Especially when my thoughts are as follows.

I miss you. Not as you are now, because who you are now is not the someone I was with. You've become something less. Something more hollow. Empty. I fear you now. Not because of how you can destroy me over and over again, but because you aren't you. You aren't you at all but you look like you. I fear the destruction of the beautiful think you have become in my memory. I want to speak to you. I want to touch you. I want to feel your warmth and see your smile. But I can't. For in my mind and in my heart you are the most beautiful thing I have ever seen and touched in my entire life. I'm scared. I don't want to let go, but I know I could never be with you again. This is not because I can't be around you per say. This is because you as you existed before no longer exists now. I still mourn the loss every morning, day, and night. I mourn the loss of the person whose eyes I will never gaze lovingly into again. I can look in yours, but they will no longer be yours.

And I hate that the world is against you because they see the you as you are now. I am the lone soldier fighting to preserve who you once were.

I hate that you still exist somewhere. I hate it because I don't think you will ever let her out again. She was the most beautiful thing I could ever imagine. Life as you have chosen to live it does not take kindly to sincerity. It shuns the truly beautiful.

I will miss you forever and always as you fade. Will anyone ever know what truly incredible person lies dormant in you like I did?

You.
Deserve.
More.

And I do too.